I should stop describing my life or my thoughts or my un-diagnosed ADD as strange, because with its regularity it has established a very disastrous (and beautiful) normal. Having said that, I have several ironic things to report.
My last post, “unplugged,” surprised me by its multiple meanings (a strange occurrence – normally I squeeze out every possible meaning!) and so I’ll backtrack to fill you in.
On Saturday night, I went to the school fall costume party as a Christmas tree and literally spent the whole evening lit up… and plugged in to an outlet.
bringing the Christmas spirit to fall…
you could find waldo AND Christmas at the fall party!
giving one of the gifts hanging from my tree!
We were also literally unplugged for some of Saturday night and most of Sunday due to power outages. It’s no wonder when our power lines look like this:
Lastly, I can’t help but add that “unplugged” sounds similar to the familiar phrase, “coming unglued” or “undone,” which is what Jenna was thinking last night on the way to Micah Project when I covered the subjects of students’ college applications, baking, new friends made at the coffeeshop, paranoia with my car Louis, my dad selling a calf, plans for a pep assembly this Friday, and Christmas service schedule.
Whew! There you have it – multiple meanings for “unplugged.”
I continue to surprise myself at my own tendency for disorganization. I left my keys at work after conferences and my computer on the school bus on the way home. I’ve overlapped about 10 plans this weekend and have succeeded at about two. I am using a friend’s computer to assure you (in case you are staying up late at night wondering) that I’m still keeping it real here in Tegucigalpa… and the October newsletter is almost ready to post!
I do want to report that “God’s heifer,” (read here, bottom paragraph) as my mom has been calling it, resulted in a hefty check that I get to spread around the ministries here like a heaping spoonful of creamy peanut butter. It is truly a gift to watch God’s provision shared amongst those who depend on Him!
Today, I’m doing some reading and baking for the Micah Project folks. Hope to go for a run to clear all the dysfunctional cobwebs hanging out in my brain!
You think I’m kidding, but today sealed the deal. Here are some of the things today that overflowed my cup:
I drove to school instead of rode the bus, which perfectly placed about 8.5 extra minutes to spend with David in 1 Samuel
I ran out of coffee filters at my house, but savored a Vanilla Chai tea… delicious start!
I met the day with uncharacteristic (before coffee), silly joy and greeted students with grand gestures and lopsided smiles.
During our mid-morning break, I was heading back from an errand in the administration building, secretly hoping two certain, special students would be waiting in my office… and THEY WERE. I think I scared them with my loopy-ness and laughter, but I don’t care. I love it when I find students in my office… especially when the special ones appear!
CHAPEL happens Monday and today was such a blessing! I am sure many of the seniors won’t admit it, but they want to know about hearing God’s voice. That was exactly the message!
Then, I got to counsel one of my favorite students using a SWEET analogy about records playing in our heads. Sometimes we’ve let the record of lies steal the show and we listen to it over and over and start to believe all the foolishness it plays. We’ve got to put that sweet record called Truth on stat and then you better believe we’re gonna speak and act out of that life-giving overflow! I’ll admit, my favorite part was connecting it to a Corinne Bailey Rae song, “Put Your Records On” because every time I saw her I broke out into singing.
I love that THIS was shown to remember our time at the SLEEPout!
then…(drumroll) it’s MONDAY so that means culinary collision with two of my favorite ladies! I seriously can’t explain how beautiful and brilliant these girls are… so I won’t try. Just read this blogpost and you’ll get a little taste of the night (not a real taste, but a cyber-ish one:).
I love praying in my car on the way back from Monday baking dates. Shoot, and I just have to say again how much I love these amazing high school girls. They may/may not be changing my life (mostly may).
I may/may not have consumed too much caffeine today (mostly may), which means I might be up writing for awhile!
I’ve got dream bars in the oven (with a variation that has me puzzled about cooking time), I’m munching on tortillas with sun-dried tomato hummus (the strangest before-bedtime snack I’ve ever been a part of), and I’m looking at what I picked up at the grocery store: fake milk in a box, chocolate chips, powdered sugar, pumpkin, and oatmeal (wondering why these are my first purchases after paycheck), and I’m thinking it’s a strange day.
Oh, well. I’m sure you have those days too. Nothing especially wrong or out of place, but you feel like you are moving around in someone else’s skin and it’s just uncomfortable. At this point, all of you who haven’t felt this way have at least one eyebrow raised. Which, I guess, is kind of my point.
Sometimes I get overwhelmed with everything I want to do or read or hear or say or know and I go into overload mode. Hm. I imagine this is what a baby bird might feel when it first discovers its wings. There are so many endless possibilities – so many adventures and birdies to adventure with and trees and clouds and…
then there’s that typical picture of the not-yet-ready-for-flight
birdie falling clumsily from the nest.
There’s no better way to explain than to give a few examples, so here they are in NO particular order:
I really want to know if there is a connection in the Hebrew word “paneh,” which means presence and the Spanish word “pan,” which means bread. We’re studying the story of David right now and when he ran from Saul he stopped and asked for bread from a priest who only had holy bread on hand. This bread was called “paneh” because it was the bread of the Presence. I thought, how neat would it be if there was a connection because Christ (the Word) became physically present and is the bread of life. I have searched and can’t make sense of etymologies in several languages… The farthest I got led me to some Polish explanation of Mr. and Mrs. (which is pan/pani).
At what point are liberties counterproductive in recipes? I mean, a little more butter, flour, and sugar would naturally just increase quantity, no? And peanut butter always adds value, right? Tomorrow we will find out! I’m sincerely hoping that my scheme to encourage “Taste and see the Lord is good” (Ps. 38:4) leads them to understand GOD is what the need to taste! (More joy and satisfaction, less tummy-ache!)
Why does pride always wiggle its way into the category of “self-preservation”? That is a lie through and through.
I hope with every hope in my heart baking becomes drastically cheaper.
I have been reading an absolutely amazing book called, “Competent to Counsel” by Jay E. Adams and I love how he challenges the excuses we make for personality by saying, “It’s just who I am.” We are in a sanctification process, here, folks – there’s no settling for “just who I am.” So, I started to wonder (out loud) about how I should change my personality… what needs refining? I was wondering this and talking to my friend Sarah, when all of a sudden I wondered if I could still do the splits. I paused, slinkered down as far as I could and then popped back up above the countertop and said, “not quite.” She burst out laughing and then she said, “More of that. You should definitely change your personality to include more splits.” I don’t know…
There’s this student. She is amazing, beautiful, inspiring and God is transforming her right in front of my eyes. I’ve never had a front row seat to something so spectacular! I mean, here I am, sitting next to her just listening to her talk with such seriousness about faith and plans. But, it’s not just fluffy, future talk. This girl is making it happen in her life the way some kids can only make it happen at summer camp or youth conferences. I’m just thinking, “What’s up with this?” God is SO amazing to be working and restoring and growing such a beautiful heart! And I get to watch? WOW!
I want like crazy to sew an owl costume right up for Halloween, but I’m not sure where I would go with it… which makes me want to have a costume party at my house, which reminds me of the mammoth weekend of 4 am sushi-making chaos that is barely a week behind.
There’s a crazy urgency in me to take each of these seniors by their ALP uniform shirt and shake them a little bit (friendly, of course) to make sure they know how much I love ’em and how important it is for them to know how much more MASSIVE God’s love is for them. I just want them to get it, as my Dad used to say.
I talked to my mom on Sunday and she added the greatest news – Dad finally sold the calf that was the Lord’s! I know it sounds strange… in fact, every single person I told today asked for a repeat. Buying and selling calves makes absolutely no sense to people outside the farming/cattle industry and that’s okay. What you should probably understand is the way God is using my Dad’s hobby operation to bless people around the globe. This time, he gave the calf to the Lord and said the money would go to Honduras. What joy I had as I wrote in a large sum under the current total of money raised by the sleepout. Praise the Lord!!
Oh, boy. Now do you understand a teensy bit more? My brain is like a crazy factory! It makes crazy all day, non-stop! I think I should tone down on the coffee.
It’s now 10:17 pm and I hope this day found you less strangely inclined.
let LOVE fly like cRaZy
this is an example of some serious STRANGE happening!
Yes, folks. My post today is mostly pointing to inspiration instead of giving any, but there are more important matters… like planning for this weekend’s SLEEPOUT event to raise money for the Micah Project and cleaning up after a crazy weekend…. and enjoying many uninterrupted cups of coffee, accompanied by Miike Snow, Joy Williams, and Brooke Fraser.
I guess my stories about changing a car battery, learning to jerk in my living room, and making sushi at 4 am will have to wait for another day very soon!
We are coming up on the time of year I love so so incredibly much… Thanksgiving. I know the holiday has historical significance, but to me it is mostly a beautiful time to remember all the wonderful ways God is making Himself known in our lives.
I just recently started a journey of 129 questions and 52 weeks. For the next year, on Sundays, I hope to meditate on several questions of the Heidelberg Catechism with the help of Kevin DeYoung‘s book, “The Good News We Almost Forgot.” As I read the introduction and the first day this past week, I was struck with how this question/answer list of Bible truths is organized.
Grief –> Grace –> Gratitude
Every day I see the flaws of my sinful nature peek out my skin. Every day I yearn to be in right relationship once again. Every day I see how many ways I fall dreadfully short.
And every day I am reminded that ONLY by God’s grace am I anything more than those flaws. If God’s grace is sufficient to cover all the grief that results from my sin (and I believe that it is), my ONLY comfort in life and in death (as the first question of Heidelberg asks) is that I “am not my own, but I belong, body and soul, in life and in death, to my faithful Savior Jesus Christ.” Oh, what BEAUTY it is to belong!!
The grace overwhelms me… it is too much to consider God has overcome my sin and grief and has grafted me in as His child, to BELONG to Him. What joy in this grace!
And, so friends… today as I count the blessings of facebook messages, pictures, balloons, cards, candies, and cakes, and an unbelievable amount of hugs (for today I am counting the blessings of 26 years), I am grateful.
I am overcome with gratitude for the grace God has shown me and the ways He expresses that grace through beautiful people in my life. God is so incredibly good.
let LOVE fly like cRazY
Here are the words to my favorite song of the Thanksgiving season. Just for the record, I’m so glad that every day is an appropriate time to sing these praises. Without much effort, I can call to mind the harmonizing voices of my family, gathered around a very long, harvest-laden table, singing this very song together.
When upon life’s billows you are tempest tossed,
When you are discouraged, thinking all is lost,
Count your many blessings, name them one by one,
And it will surprise you what the Lord hath done.
Refrain
Count your blessings, name them one by one,
Count your blessings, see what God hath done!
Count your blessings, name them one by one,
And it will surprise you what the Lord hath done.
Are you ever burdened with a load of care?
Does the cross seem heavy you are called to bear?
Count your many blessings, every doubt will fly,
And you will keep singing as the days go by.
Refrain
When you look at others with their lands and gold,
Think that Christ has promised you His wealth untold;
Count your many blessings. Wealth can never buy
Your reward in heaven, nor your home on high.
Refrain
So, amid the conflict whether great or small,
Do not be disheartened, God is over all;
Count your many blessings, angels will attend,
Help and comfort give you to your journey’s end.
Nothing, absolutely nothing is impossible for the God of universe who holds the whole universe in His hands. Nothing.
I praise God because this is True.
A rich man can enter the kingdom of God (Matthew 19:26), a desperate man can have hope (Jeremiah 32:27) and a young girl can carry the Messiah in her womb (Luke 1:37).
Nothing is impossible with God, Creator of heavens and earth… not tired days or dream smashers or loneliness or failures or sadness or human success or pride or busy schedules. Nothing, nothing, nothing is impossible with God.
Last Sunday, I sang underneath a blanket of stars in the courtyard of the Micah Project with some of the most beautiful and broken voices I could imagine. I love this sacred time in my week, but this past Sunday I felt even more thankful for the worship and communion.
We have been singing this song lately, by Hillsong. In English, it’s called “Stronger,” but I prefer the Spanish version, especially when I am standing next to Nelson or Wilmer. When I stand next to them I want to sing louder. I want the words to be true… I desperately want these words to be true!
The chorus is a fight,
“You are stronger you are stronger
Sin is broken you have saved me
it is written Christ is risen
Jesus you are Lord of all.”
I love that my desperate plea is one God has already answered. He is stronger. He is sovereign He is surprised by nothing and fears nothing. Nothing is impossible with God.
O LORD, our Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth!
You have set your glory above the heavens.
Out of the mouth of babies and infants, you have established strength because of your foes, to still the enemy and the avenger.
When I look at your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you have set in place, what is man that you are mindful of him, and the son of man that you care for him?
Yet you have made him a little lower than the heavenly beings and crowned him with glory and honor.
You have given him dominion over the works of your hands; you have put all things under his feet, all sheep and oxen, and also the beasts of the field, the birds of the heavens, and the fish of the sea, whatever passes along the paths of the seas.
O LORD, our Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth! (Psalm 8ESV)
This is a short article I included in my September newsletter, for those that didn’t have the patience to wait for the 30 minute PDF download 🙂
Taste and see that the Lord is good.
These are words that wake me up in the morning and carry me through both spectacular and somber days. This is the word of the Lord. This is His proclamation and promise that He is good. We know God is faithful (Romans 3:3-4) even when we are found without faith. He keeps His promises even when we have twisted His words.
God is always true, always perfect, always good. Do I sound redundant? I hope so. The blessing of this truth seems to seep in anew every time I return to it.
Recently, I’ve been re-discovering God’s faithfulness in this promise (that we can taste and see He is good) by way of baked goods, full kitchens, and Monday afternoons. Before you think that I’m about to blaspheme this beautiful verse in Psalm 34, keep reading. I believe God works through the everyday-ness of life to teach us eternal truths. Right now, baked goods, full kitchens, and Monday afternoons happen to be that beautiful everyday classroom.
Before the school year began, I had visions of laughter circles and conversation and community. How to realize these visions is… another thing entirely. I’m no expert, but I’ve been to college and I know what draws a crowd: food.
God’s design – the very way He worked out the specific details of our bodies – involves a real need for food. Sure, we distorted and perverted and twisted this real need into dependence and false comfort and momentary satisfaction. But, in the beginning, God made Adam and Eve with a body to enjoy – taste and see – food.
He intentionally chose to make us dependent on food for survival, but also capable of enjoying the necessity. He didn’t have to do that, but He did. Wow.
And there’s more.
We are all familiar with the words from Genesis 1:27, “So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them.”
What I didn’t recognize until day two of Kay Arthur’s “Return to the Garden” study (in a room full of high school girls gobbling up warm cookies) are these words in 2:18: “The Lord God said, ‘It is not good for man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.’”
God knew long before extracting a rib that Adam was made for relationship. Adam was made in the image of a triune God and longed for community before he even knew what to call the longing.
So, we were made to eat and we were made to share. Let me re-phrase: we were made to eat, share, and ENJOY it. I just cannot get over this design.
The most beautiful part of my re-discoveries is a return to the thought from which all these began, “Taste and see that the Lord is good.” There is a hunger in our bellies only satisfied by more of Him. Every sweet blessing is a reflection of this Truth.
As my heart wells up with thanksgiving at the way we are designed to enjoy life together (through baked goods, full kitchens, and Monday afternoons), I know my true affection is for the Creator of these marvelous things. He is, indeed, good. His design reflects our need for and our satisfaction in Him alone.
Psalm 34:8 continues, “blessed is the man who takes refuge in Him.”
MUSINGS IN THE MIDST 